LET ME ASK YOU…

A strange week.  

An ‘echoes of the past’ week…

The Love Is Not Enough marketing support including a television interview, 3 podcasts, and judging a power lifting championship.

The television thing happened this week in Savannah, the final edit to air on the NBC streaming affiliate, WSAV+. To be shared upon receipt.

A benefit of this post: Really fun things to look forward to.

I received potential ‘Dan’ questions in advance, which were pretty tough – what was his drivers license number? – but they invited serious reflection for My Captor and me.

The toughest “What do you wish you’d understood when you still believed love would carry the whole weight?”

Which led to a discussion with My Captor of what we did – right and wrong – dealing with Dan’s mental health and addiction issues; finally deciding it was a trick question, because we never believed love could carry the whole weight.

But even as I type that line, I find myself doing the “What could I have done differently?” thing, which is dangerous territory: The past is past, let it be.

We’re fortunate in not spending a lot of past-dissection time, instead looking forward.    

A valuable learning, perhaps our most important: Keep looking forward.

In interview prep, I quickly re-read the book, an emotional experience in itself. It’d been a while; focusing on the ‘tear jerker’ parts. In hindsight, I owed myself that.

The interview moved smoothly, probably my best interview ever. My first of course, but the interviewer kept things moving, allowing me to add things as I remembered them, which I’m thinking will be fixed in the edit. And an oldster thing.

I’m hoping the “I guess it has to be endured to be believed” line makes the edit, it really summing up the last 20 months.

But that wasn’t the end of the strangeness: We received a visit from one of Dan’s high school friends on Saturday, he in town to visit family – with his delightful wife Stephanie, who we were excited to meet.

Henry now 12 years sober, crediting Dan with being an influence to get him into recovery, and being part of the support group that saved his life.

Who attempted to keep in contact with Dan, but was at best ghosted, at worst lied to – Dan texting him he’d just gotten out of a 30-day program – but who’d made a serious effort to repay Dan’s favor.

All stuff we knew, but hearing it giving it new life.

He shared multiple Dan stories, amazing to hear: Bringing Dan back to life. Sometimes it’s okay to look back. 

We loved our discussion, but like the interview and it’s prep, it was draining.

He finished with a story happening after the February celebration of life; he and 2 brothers – also sober, also crediting Dan as an influence (Those who can’t do, teach?) – had lunch at Barbara Jeans, their check already settled when they went to pay.

The benefactors had written Numbers 6:24-26 on the check:

“The Lord bless you and keep you;

The Lord makes his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;

The Lord turn his face to you and give you peace”

A perfect description of recovery and acceptance…

He had no idea why, guessing they overheard them talking about Dan and the Celebration of Life; grateful nonetheless.

The visit great for us, our first ‘inside baseball’ discussion about Dan’s opioid use and inability to overcome the drug. And his humanness, learning he was “the most popular kid in high school”!

But the best part of their visit? Someone got out alive. And doing great!

Viewed correctly, good can come from bad…

ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT OF THIS POST, PAIR WITH THE FOLLOWING ‘AGING HIPSTER MUSIC/READING’:

Deer Tick has a new album out this Thursday. Will report back next week. They the most famous rock band from Providence, RI. Behind only George M. Cohan in local renown.

And Love Is Not Enough still available on Amazon. What a great read for anyone who has dealt with mental health or addiction issues. Or just wants to read about family love and recovery.