YOU SEEM WORRIED

Worry is a curious thing.

We all worry, but everyone wears it differently.

Some are outwardly tense, and you can tell they are worried. And as we all know, telling someone to ‘relax’ doesn’t help.

Others are worried, but don’t seem so. I believe I fit this category, and when asked “You’re not worried?” respond “Churning on the inside”.

It is a truism – correct, I might add – that you worry about your children until they worry about you. Though I know my children have been worried about me for years, but that’s a subject for a whole other post…

There’s another truism – partially correct, I might add – that “it ain’t too hard to get along with somebody else’s troubles”. It fits and doesn’t fit: Britney Spears has been in the news recently, and while some of us might (might) be interested, I would guess only those close to her are worried. Hopefully the court will award her that new double wide and we can all move on.

And when we ask folks “How are you? it is essentially a rhetorical question…

But when issues hit close to home, we tend to wear them like they are our own. I worry about my Captor’s health more than I worry about my own, and she mine, so we’re even.

But there’s likely an Old Man Rant that covers being worried about: Don’t worry about me, I’m fine! As a protective move, I tend to keep personal health details to myself, which I understand can frustrate my loved ones. But it’s just the way old men are wired, I guess.

Or maybe it’s a Midwestern thing, having grown up in Omaha. We called it “poor mouthing”, the practice of hiding personal details and/or material holdings from others. Farmers were experts. When asked how the crop looked, they generally ‘poor mouthed’ the prospects: Haven’t had enough rain, Corn prices are dropping daily, Do these overalls make me look fat?

I worked with a native Iowan who bought a new Mercedes, but explained that it was “one of the small ones”. Poor mouthed a Mercedes!

I guess the anti-Midwestern thing is the person you meet who shares all the details of their life in the first 5 minutes.   

Humans are experts at attempting to defer worry. As long as the worry item is in the future, we can let it leave our mind. But never totally,,,

There are 3 other sayings (someday to be upgraded to truisms) that fit here:

“Nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so”. Authored by a grad school Marketing prof, along with “I never believed in child abuse, until I had children”.

“Your deepest worries are the ones that wake you in the middle of the night.” That one came from a Bazooka Joe wrapper.

“Don’t assume the outcome”. Much worry comes from assuming the worst – best to wait and deal with it if it arrives. Thank you Magic 8 Ball for that gem.

The good news about worry?

It makes us uniquely human. Dogs may get nervous, but don’t worry.

The other quality that makes us human? Optimism. A dog never wakes up thinking things are going to get better…

I believe my Mother said it best: “Don’t worry. Things will work out”.

TO ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT, PAIR WITH THE FOLLOWING SONGS:

Senses Working Overtime  XTC

“And all the world is biscuit-shaped
It’s just for me to feed my face
And I can see, hear, smell, touch, taste
And I’ve got one, two, three, four, five

Senses working overtime
Trying to take this all in”

World At Large  Modest Mouse

“Ice age, heat wave, can’t complain
If the world’s at large, why should I remain?   

Went to the porch to have a thought
Got to the door and, again, I couldn’t stop
You don’t know where and you don’t know when
But you still got your words and you got your friends

Well uh-uh, baby, I ain’t got no plan
Well I float on, maybe would you understand?”

The Young Thousands   Mountain Goats

‘The things that you’ve got coming will consume you
There’s someone waiting out there in an alley with a chain

The ghosts that haunt your building are prepared to take on substance
And the dull pain that you live with isn’t getting any duller

The things that you’ve got coming will do things that you’re afraid to
There is someone waiting out there with a mouthful of surprises”

The Fear  The Shins

Oh, don’t you feel fear
Of all the stupid things
A man could feel

Come back and touch my face
Feel for fever in the night
You look into my eyes
You don’t really recognize me anymore

I know I’ve run out of luck
This fear is a terrible drug
If I only had sense enough
To let it give way to love”

Somebody Else’s Troubles  Steve Goodman

“It ain’t hard to get along with somebody else’s troubles
And they don’t make you lose any sleep at night
As long as fate is out there burstin’ somebody else’s bubbles.
Everything is gonna be alright.

So I asked the undertaker what it took to make him laugh
When all he ever saw is people cryin’.
First he hands me a bunch of flowers that he’d received on my behalf
He said, “Steve, business just gets better all the time.”