The man my captor calls “The Governor” assured us that if we continued to follow C19 guidelines: Wear a mask, social distance, and avoid almond based candies, that life would get better.

And he was right. We watched Jeopardy tonight and there were no political commercials, so whatever he did worked. The accusations hurled by the candidates: He can’t be trusted, is lying, has no fashion sense, and has slow gig speeds, were tough to watch. Unfortunately, air time has now been turned over to the cable/internet companies. The accusations they hurl at each other: They lie, can’t be trusted, and are socialists with slow gig speeds, are just as tough to take. But it does remind us that the cable provider you hate the most is your current one.

And while we’re sitting on the couch eating peanut M&Ms, we have time to contemplate our national slog into banana republic status: Elections no one trusts – that seemingly never end, citizens storming the homes of public officials, burro time shares, and a media that chooses not to investigate their preferred candidate. The only thing missing is armed peaceful protesters burning stuff up (down?)… never mind.

One of my political curiosities: Why is a former Senator still referred to as Senator? In that spirit, I would like to be called Middle Manager Chess from now on.

But as we attempt to heal as a nation and close our partisan divide, I would remind us all that hypocrisy and ineptitude run very deep on both sides of the aisle… Assume you’re going to get screwed and you’ll never be disappointed.

Back to C19: I fear that the man my captor calls “The Governor” is adding restrictions just to see if we’re paying attention. Why is he requiring us to learn a foreign language? And where did all these one way streets come from? And who really cares if >10% of my diet is low sodium?

But we are doing our best to stop the virus. We recently had friends over for a C19 Dinner party – all the guests were faced away from the table, to minimize contact.  And we didn’t serve any food, to further minimize contact. But we did serve alcohol, which in my experience is the best way to deal with the virus.

Our recent discussion of virtual learning was merely a concept until we saw it in action. Two of our grandchildren are actually engaged in “at home learning”, and we got to see it up close. Very tough on “parental  proctors”, and even tougher on students. It looked like even less fun then I remember high school to have been. And in the VL ‘Buddy System’ you are your own buddy – which pretty much describes my high school experience. I hid in my locker during lunch for 4 years.

And to remain in practice for the return to live school, the brothers take turns stealing the other’s lunch.  Lucky they don’t attend Catholic school, so their parents don’t have to learn how to mete out discipline without bruises.

But the punch line to all this? GA will have two runoffs for the Senate. Two! Maybe there is no God after all.  What comes on after Jeopardy…