The happiest day of their young lives…
… the most optimism filled – excitedly anticipating their lives together.
And the most memorable – until year 4 when the groom’s annual “Are you sure today’s our anniversary?” begins.
Weddings an amazing ritual, always special.
And since I’m ‘shorts-only’ between Easter and Thanksgiving, weddings one of the few times I wear a suit – or pants.
A good year when weddings outnumber funerals.
But the wedding weekend and rituals ever evolving.
The ‘Welcome Party’ seemingly universal now, particularly for destination weddings.
But foreshadowing trouble ahead, if the cash bar only applies to one side of the wedding.
The ceremony can be religious – non-Believers always dazed after the full Catholic mass – or casual.
Not uncommon to photo bomb a beach wedding in progress … had I known, I’d have worn pants.
And now just about anyone – or anything – can officiate.
My Captor and I attended a pool-side resort wedding, officiated by the couple’s St. Bernard: Bark once for I Do! Scratch twice if you’ve contracted something from a bridesmaid!
It was dramatic – after fetching the wedding ring, Rover saved a guest who’d fallen into the pool.
But becoming an ordained minister is easy – my altar boy training let me skip some of the electives – and I was recently ‘ordained’.
Fun to ‘Play-Marry’ couples in bars, and imagine their faces when the marriage license arrives at their house.
The reception always entertaining: My Captor and I enjoy dinner and a few drinks, and then watch the ‘young people’ behave the way we used to.
If it wasn’t for my bad hip, I’d show them Yung’uns how to do the fried egg…
For dinner, the ‘serving station’ buffet approach quite popular – each station holding a different dinner component.
A recent wedding only served chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese – kids quit eating vegetables in 2007 – but another had sushi, which was excellent.
My suit pockets plastic lined, we ate sushi for weeks.
The final piece the wedding gift.
We check their registry – so many incredible things we can’t afford – but it gave me the idea for our 45th wedding anniversary gift: His and Hers Wheel of Fortune Virtual Headsets.
Pat and Vanna in our living room!
We usually send a check: Money’s practical, works everywhere, and good until the U.S. bankrupts, which won’t be for a couple of years, at least.
Though our hot new gift, bacon – the most expensive thing we could find on the registry.
But destination weddings a thing unto themselves.
We’re currently in Denver, at a good friend’s son’s wedding.
Staying in a room reserved from the ‘wedding block’ – 8 months ago – leading to the inevitable moment of panic: I know I booked the hotel! Where’s the reservation confirmation?
Feeling spared at the welcome party – the bride’s side had the cash bar!
Last November, I chose steak for my dinner entree – heading off my potentially rash move to become vegetarian.
The officiant, an actual Priest, healed my hip – – I led the communal Fried Egg!
Later, giving Polka lessons, a dance learned at family weddings.
Fun fact: Worked my way through college at a dime a dance Polka-hall, catering to lonely Polish women.
Luckily, we brought a check, so we could leave a gift – the TSA seizing our gift bacon.
Though based on our hosts’ reaction, our making the effort to attend the best gift.
But My Captor said we still had to give the check…
And I’ve learned something from weddings past: If the Minister asks if anyone has any objections, best to forever hold your peace…
For 226 more posts like this –each with a wish for a hint on where they got their band– go to beersatthenifty.com. Your phone will display every post, and you can waste an hour or two.
Or send me an email to the site, and I’ll add you to my Sunday distribution.
And I’m now on Substack at justluckytobehere.substack.com. Same stuff, but a different location.
ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT OF THIS POST, PAIR IT WITH THE FOLLOWING ‘AGING HIPSTER MUSIC’:
While I enjoy The Be Good Tanyas, last week’s selection, My Captor reminded that a post heavy on baseball should have baseball music. As, always, she’s right – right, dear? – so this week I offer my favorite baseball song ‘Centerfield’ by John Fogerty. Upon hearing, always reminding me of Orioles games in college, sitting in the center field bleachers – tickets 85 cents, a long time ago – dreaming of being Paul Blair -he a fantastic defensive CF.
Fogerty, lead of CCR, ‘Born on the Bayou’ one of my seminal albums. Find Proud Mary, their largest hit. To the BATN playlist, I’ve added ‘Centerfield’ and ‘Talkin’ Softball’, which was part of a great Simpsons episode, Mr. Burns ringer-ing the plant’s softball team roster with pros, but Homer winning the game in a very Homer way.