“If you’re that hard up, go ahead”.
A profound thought delivered by a Grad School Marketing prof. He had distributed graded papers to allow us a look before he recorded the results, and had written the grades in pencil.
A stereotypical MBA student – who probably became an investment banker and now owns an island somewhere, but remains unsatisfied because his neighbor owns a bigger island – said: “Gee Bobby, these grades are in pencil. We could change them before we give them back”.
Bobby’s response lives in family infamy, and even I’ve grown weary of its retelling.
But it says an awful lot about recognizing what’s important.
As an aside, I later did a research project for him, and still owe him a paper. He gave me a grade and not an incomplete, so I graduated on time. But I’m always nervous when I go to renew my driver license.
Bobby consulted to ad agencies and tested potential ad slogans, and my project was part of that work.
These included:
“Electroshock therapy – not just for the criminally insane”, for a local power company exploring alternative uses for their product.
“You’ll drink it night and day- We put the cocaine back in!”, for the introduction of Habit Cola.
“You’ll remember to sign up for Medicare!”, for Dr, A. Heimer’s Brain Tonic.
But there are lots of other grad school professor quotes that roll through my head:
“I never believed in child abuse until I had children”.
“For me, the issue with abortion is that our society will no longer have any moral absolutes”.
“We lost the Vietnam War because we were fighting for an institution, while they were fighting for a principle.”
Unfortunately, the things I remember from grad school are unrelated to what I was studying at the time… I still can only come up with 3 of the 4 P’s.
It is instructive – and a bit depressing -to look back on our educational careers and realize that we were focused on grades, instead of learning.
Or for those of us who were focused on our old friend Mr. Schlitz, and his cousin B.D. Wiser, really focused on the wrong thing. Thank God for the lack of social media back in the day!
But imagine the chance to go back and read the great books and think the great thoughts – I might even take a class before 3P.
But now that I’m retired, I am trying to read the books I missed, which is also part of my plan for a long life: living long enough to read the 1000 greatest books of all time.
Bobby’s bit of truth is just one nugget of “Fatherly Wisdom” shared with our children over the years. My favorites include:
“If you’re wondering why things work the way they do, follow the money”
“Achieve success for yourself – not anyone else. But it is a sign of emotional maturity to be able to root for your friends’ success”
“I’d rather be the guy who bought the Brooklyn Bridge than the one who sold it”
“You can count your true friends on one hand –and might have fingers left over”
But perhaps the most profound – and borne out over generations – piece of wisdom is: “Be patient, this will all make sense in time”.
We all have to live and figure things out for ourselves, and decide what truly matters.
And behave accordingly.
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TO ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT OF THIS POST, PAIR IT WITH THE FOLLOWING SONGS:
Love, love, love Mountain Goats
“Raskolnikov felt sick, but he couldn’t say why
When he saw his face reflected in his victim’s twinkling eye
Some things you’ll do for money and some you’ll do for fun
But the things you do for love are going to come back to you one by one
Love, love is going to lead you by the hand
Into a white and soundless place
Now we see things as in a mirror, dimly
Then we shall see each other face to face
Some moments last forever, but some flare out with love, love, love
Some things you’ll do for money and some you’ll do for fun
But the things you do for love are going to come back to you one by one”
Kids MGMT
‘… Control yourself
Take only what you need from it
A family of trees wanting
To be haunted
… Control yourself
Take only what you need from it”
He’s Gone Grateful Dead
“Goin’ where the wind don’t blow so strange
Maybe off on some high cold mountain chain
Lost one round but the price wasn’t anything
A knife in the back and more of the same
Same old, rat in a drain ditch, caught on a limb
You know better but I know him
Like I told you, what I said
Steal your face right off your head”
On the way down Allen Toussaint (Covered splendidly by Little Feat)
“Sunrise, Sunset
Since the beginning it hasn’t changed yet
People fly high begin to lose sight
You can’t see very clearly when you’re in flight
It’s high time that you found
The same dudes you misuse on your way up
You might meet up
On your way down”
Comment (If all men are truly brothers) Wilco
“Watch out for your friends
Well, they may lose in the end
Sometimes their child can make you sin
What is a man without a friend?
We all live within a game, The word ‘Excuse’ has many names
Where true friends really come, You can’t afford to lose one
If all men were truly brothers, Why then do we hurt one another?
Love and peace from ocean to ocean
Somebody please second my emotion
All men were born to be free, yeah
What about you? And what about me?
This world is filled with hate, there’s nothing left
If you enslave me, you’ll never rescue yourself
Well, jealousy, as I recall
Has always been man’s hardest fall
To conquer fear, that’s quite a quest
Until we do never rest
A child was born yesterday, Oh, nothing but an innocent babe
Someone sowed a bitter seed, How could it grow but a bitter weed?
Society, how can you teach, I wanna know
If you don’t practice what you preach?
Hey you, over there, oh I wanna know why you left
With all your riches and your fancy things
Can you tell me how many friends
Can you truly say you have?”