FADED JEANS

I have a few clothes on my side of the closet. Not a lot of clothes compared to my Captor, but a decent amount for a male. And while I am certainly no clothes horse, I most certainly dress better than most horses.

I have accumulated them over time, because people don’t know what to buy a grumpy old man for his birthday, so frequently a new shirt is “just the ticket”. Or perhaps they’ve re-gifted the shirt from last year which I never opened…

But I find that I only wear a limited portion of my closet – maybe 3 different shirts and pairs of shorts  – and much of the remainder is ‘Goodwill ready’. And I usually wear the same red shirt and shorts when we go out, which is my version of “Adult Garanimals”.

It recently struck me that friends follow the same pattern: You might have a lot of friends, but very rarely do you pull more than a few ‘off the rack’.

This really came home when we reconnected with our couple’s book club this weekend, which is comprised of some of my/our closest friends.

Three of the four couples were able to attend, and we met at a friend’s lake house. It had been over a year – not sure what happened in 2020 – but our hosts were great to make the invite.

From the meeting location you can tell that this was more social than book, but we did tuck a book discussion into the weekend. It was my pick, we discussed the “Wonderful Wizard of Oz”, and there was more to discuss than you might think.

We discussed the political allegory about Washington and monetary policy many consider it to be – in this version the Wizard provides their ‘asks’ via the “reconciliation process”, the differences of book vs. movie – in the book, the poppies put them to sleep, in the movie they help the writers stay up all night making script changes, and the amazing soundtrack.

The latter led us to lyricist Yip Harburg and “Lydia the Tattooed Lady” sung by Groucho Marx – well worth the 4 minutes on YouTube. 

But in addition to the political overtones, we also ferreted out other ‘hidden messages’: The Wizard as the Walrus, the Wizard as Luke’s father, and the foreshadowing of Kansas’ possible move to the SEC.

And while one takeaway from all the “hidden allegories” that have been concocted is that people are searching for meaning where there is none – high school English, anyone? – which might be a bleak “hidden allegory” for the meaninglessness of life. If you believe that one then “Lydia” will cheer you up.

But in the end, we decided that the real message was that you have it in you to get things done, and you’ve always have had that power. Whether it be returning to Kansas, solving today’s crossword puzzle, or parallel parking, you have it in you.

A good friend’s encouragement and support remind us of that, and their rooting for our success ahead of their own. A tough bar to meet, which is why “you can count your true friends on one hand” as my Mother used to say.

Personally, my connections got a little fuzzy this past year, with Covid as a great excuse. Another good one was “They could call me, I tried to call them a few months ago”, or I’ll get around to it.

But this weekend was a vivid reminder of the importance of friends and renewed connections.

And so as we approach September of the year (and of our years), I will pull out the two pairs of jeans I wear, and remind myself that true friends are like faded jeans: Comfortable, supportive, beautifully worn. 

Check out beersatthenifty.com for 60 other posts about these post-Apocalyptic times.

TO ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT OF THIS POST, PAIR IT WITH THE FOLLOWING SONGS:

Bookends  Simon and Garfunkel

“Time it was, and what a time it was, it was

A time of innocence, a time of confidences

Long ago, it must be, I have a photograph

Preserve your memories, they’re all that’s left you”

Martha  Tom Waits

“Meet me out for coffee, Where we’ll talk about it all.
And those were the days of roses
Poetry and prose and Martha, All I had was you and all you had was me.
There was no tomorrows, We’d packed away our sorrows
And we saved them for a rainy day”

Somebody that I used to know  Elliott Smith

I had tender feelings that you made hard, But it’s your heart, not mine, that’s scarred
So when i go home, i’ll be happy to go, You’re just somebody that i used to know

You don’t need my help anymore, It’s all now to you, there ain’t no before
Now that you’re big enough to run your own show
You’re just somebody that i used to know

Somebody Might wave back  The Waterboys

“Seven O’clock in the morning and I’m carrying bags under my eyes
Been awake all night, counting the hours to sunrise
(Drawing patterns, beating rhythms) on the tabletop
I lift my gaze and my mouth just dropped
Someone waving in the window at me
And I say “Hey there, what are you waving at?”
When he says “What do I have to lose,
Somebody might wave back”
What do I have to lose,
Somebody might wave back”

Lydia the Tattooed Lady  Groucho

“Lydia, oh! Lydia, say have you met Lydia

Oh! Lydia, the tattooed lady

She has eyes that folks adore so, And a torso even more so

Lydia, oh! Lydia, that “Encyclopedia”

Oh! Lydia, the Queen of tattoo

On her back is the Battle of Waterloo, Beside it the Wreck of the Hesperus too

And proudly above waves , The Red, White and Blue

You can learn a lot from Lydia”