A ROPIN’ AND A RIDIN’

Actually, this WAS my first rodeo.

I’m relatively cynical, but suppressed that worldview when My Captor mentioned our friend had suggested going to the Rodeo in Brunswick.

Plus, we’re midway through Lent, I’d given up cynicism as my sacrifice, so not really an option.

But I was semi-excited about our outing – though it was in Brunswick, which meant I’d have to leave the island and cross the bridge, but our friend Pete agreed to drive, so only half as bad.

My Captor volunteered to buy the tickets – $5 off when purchased in advance! – downloaded to our phone, so the rodeo clearly had some technical chops.

Unfortunately, most of the $5 discount eaten up by the card processing fee, engendering a conversation about merchants adding 3% to cover card fees: Ridiculous! Unfair! The group consensus.

And the tickets made good for Evy’s payment for My Captor’s doilies at a Church fair, which we zelled but she never accepted. Making me wonder if Evy lacks technical chops, but they have the whole house generator we utilize when our power’s out, so there’s that.

Or maybe she just wanted to pay for My Captor’s doilies…

My Captor and I have been to a Renaissance Faire – the extra ‘e’ adding $5 to the ticket cost giving the event of bit of ‘Medieval flavor’ (the extra e’s are everywhere!), and a State Fair, figuring the rodeo would be like them/those.  

Boy, were we right! Boy, were we wrong!

We were right in that there was food everywhere – notably, no turkey legs or weird fried foods – and the other attendees ‘weren’t from around here’, so a slice of humanity we don’t see very often.

But we were WAY wrong on the rodeo’s vibe, which was very patriotic, very Christian.

And what a Trump rally must feel like – guessing 99% of the attendees were Trump voters, but that could be low.

As usual, I was wronglydressed: No boots, cowboy hat or massive belt buckle.

And most of the riders in perfectly pressed white shirts, making me look more slovenly.

It began with Miss (something) Rodeo – apparently from San Diego, rodeo is everywhere! – carrying our flag for the National Anthem.

As an aside, her title way more exotic than ‘Miss (something) Rodeo’ – will get it at our next rodeo…

The Anthem spliced between commentary on “this the greatest country in the world”, which the crowd agreed with.

Then transitioning to the opening prayer, prefaced with “If you don’t like prayer, go get yourself a hot dog and come back for the rodeo”.

From there, on to the ropin’ and ridin’.

The riders rode bareback and then with saddles – the objective was staying on 8 seconds, a lot longer for them than us – and the horses were very upset about bein’ rid.

As another aside, I shouted “Good Ridin’” enough, those sitting near me started a petition to put the letter G back on ridin’ and ropin’.   

A trick rider next – impressive – followed by calf ropin’. Sorry, roping.

A bunch of kid activities then happened, which is when we left. Technical chops or not, it was time to go.

Pete had been to 3 rodeos previously, was disappointed by the early exit, but we still had a great time – unlike the poor calves that ‘got roped’.

It was fun for a good cause: A fund raiser for The Enterprise Club of Brunswick, helping the poor and disadvantaged, and 48 cents of our ticket cost was tax deductible!

And better yet, the post-rodeo Number 6 dance had started … the funnest part of the night!

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For 284 more posts like this –each with a wish to find that stray calf– go to beersatthenifty.com. Your phone will display every post, and you can waste an hour or two.

ENHANCE YOUR ENJOYMENT OF THIS POST, PAIR IT WITH THE FOLLOWING ‘AGING HIPSTER MUSIC’:

Alan and Joe, you were right – MJ Lenderman is the real deal. I’ve added ‘She’s Leaving You’ ‘Wristwatch’ and his new single ‘She’s Dancing in the club’, which is excellent.